Crashed a clunker
Broke the bumper
Thwacked my thunker
Pinched the pumper
Just enough to get home
(You can't say I never)
Lost a big bone
Bonked my big dome
Wore the big cone
Barked a big groan
Got left at home all alone
(You can't say I never)
Gripped the grip stick
Dipped the dipstick
Left my lipstick
On the sip stick
TMJ thurts my jaw
(You can't say I never)
Bounced a gumball
Gummed a bounce ball
Want amount tall
Bank account small
Not sure if clay could fix my flaws
(You can't say I never)

You can't say I never went to school
Can't say I never broke my arm
Took shit, kissed fist of the tool who
Took the piss and said I'm pissing in the pool, ooh
Hold your horses, hold your horses
Keep holding 'til they're corpses
Don't expect me to go and cite my sources
'Cause the only string of words I'll possibly endorse is

I understand your problems
Our hearts have hands
So put her there
Now let's d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-dance
Bystanders gather 'round just
to get a get a get a glimpse, a glance of what
My eyes found down on the ground

And a glance is what you shall get
Just sit tight
Alright there's something
Not quite right or something
They just don't know how I feel
They just don't get
Little bit by little bit
Another brick another brick
I'm about to throw an F-ing freaking flipping fucking fit
I'm sick of it, I'm sick of it
I'm sick of stuck in thick of it
A little brittle baby playing monkey in the middle with myself
No other monkey, since there never is and never was another middle monkey
But it wouldn't even matter 'cause

Shucks, I'm shy
Oh, what a perfect admission
To prove to you I've been given ground vision
Maybe you can see it in my eyes, bone dry
'Cause I'm the sand that you walk on at the beach where you wonder
How have all these clocks gone by?
You can't say I never-
Tried and true
These words will never find you
It gets so hard to talk when you always chew your chalk

(It's hard work minding all this business)

But I don't know what this business is
But I don't know how to rest this leg
But I don't know what this omelet is
But I can't unbreak this egg
But I don't know what this business is
All I know is how to cut my teeth
And that ticks and pisses me off
'Cause my teeth are where I can't see

So if the ground gets you
Just look me up
And I'll look down
And if the frown train choos
I'll tell you what
I'll bust that gut

I understand your problems
Our hearts have hands
So put her there
Now let's d-d-d-d-d-d-d-d-
Don't you have somewhere to be?
Oh, yeah wow, would you look at the time
Uhh- let- lemme- uhh- let's see

One time I cried
Another perfect admission
To prove to you I've been given ground vision
Maybe you can see it in my eyes, bone dry
'Cause I'm the sand that you walk on at the beach where you wonder
How'd you cry with those dry eyes?
You can't say I never-
Tried and true
These words will never find you
It gets so hard to talk when you always chew your chalk